Do you have family members that have falling away from the church?

I think that you have received a lot of wise, excellent advice from our fellow forum members.

I have some thoughts that are a little different, and may or may not be applicable to your situation.

You mention that when you spend time with certain family members that you end up lashing out at them. In anger, I assume? If so, you may want to avoid being around them whenever possible so as to "avoid the near occasion of sin". Avoidance is recommended in all sorts of situations with family or friends prone to gossip, excessive drinking, etc. Anger (or whatever) should be no different.

I understand what you mean about wanting to be a good Catholic example to others. I think it's really admirable. It's just easy to get sucked into the drama and stoop to their level. It happens to the best of us.

I have a lot of difficult family members too. I try to limit conversation with them as much as possible. For me, the kids are a great excuse to get away from prickly family members and not get drawn into drama. So maybe if you can't avoid the situation all together, maybe just avoid certain family members? Or severely limit your time with them?

I have one other thought. A few years ago I heard a priest on the radio recommend that when we are around troubled people, or those far from the faith, that we should ask God to bring these people some kind of situation that will cause them to turn toward Him. The advice stuck with me because it was different.

I recently prayed this type of prayer for my very difficult father who is terrified of hell due to a sketchy past. He prays the Divine Mercy chaplet daily, but is too proud to go to Confession. As a convert, I'm not sure he's ever been. Just today I asked God to send my father a situation that will show him the importance of going to Confession. (I'll let you know if anything comes of that prayer)

There are no easy answers to the situations that you posted. I think a lot of us deal with similar issues. When in doubt, remember that penance adds power to prayer.

May God bless you and your family.

 

just got done watching this..this is very beautiful..

 

Wonderful response....

 

This is the crux of my dilemma, exactly. You have wonderful insight. I never thought about praying for God to send my family members a situation. I have to admit I am a little nervous about that. My fear is what if the situation sends them farther away from God. But on the other hand, I should stand firm in my faith that God would not send something that would hinder. I just might not like the way it happens.This is where "Jesus I trust in you" is essential.

 

Happy New Year! I too have family members that I worry about their salvation due to their lukewarm faith. I pray for them in different ways. During my Rosary, pray the Fatima prayers.."I believe, I adore....", I also consecrate them to Jesus and Mary, and sometimes I will just cry while speaking to Jesus or Mary....telling them how much I love my family members and I offer any suffering up for their salvation.
What I also do sometimes while praying Divine Mercy Chaplet is for each bead, when you say " for the sake of his sorrowful passion...." I concentrate on one family member at a time. I imagine them looking upon the sorrowful Jesus and feeling his love. It's very powerful when I pray it with all my heart. I feel Jesus' Divine Mercy flow to that person!!!

God Bless!

 

Coming from a big family, I can relate to many of the concerns others express about fallen away family and friends.

I was wondering if it would be a good idea to do as Jesus did when He was on the Cross. Say "Father, forgive them, they know not what they do." and mean it, like Jesus did.

Then like Jesus did on the cross with the good thief, find kind words every chance we get. Dismiss did not say sorry to Jesus, he admitted his crimes and asked Jesus to remember him when He came into His Kingdom.

I have practiced being kind and civil to certain people who get on my nerves, I try to love them for Jesus sake; and I ask Jesus to help me get through now. Jesus can let them know when they meet Him how hard it was. And hopefully the effort counts as a sacrifice. I have heard conversion requires sacrifice, this is another way to help in conversions.

We might be sowing seeds of Faith, others will reap maybe long after we are gone. But we can be doing the job God intended by trusting in God to save those He intended through our efforts.

 

This will give you hope....hate filled man finds love.....in Jesus.

All things are possible in the Holy name of Jesus. The feast day of His holy name! Praise His holy name!

 

This part of your post is perfect.....

"I have practiced being kind and civil to certain people who get on my nerves, I try to love them for Jesus sake; and I ask Jesus to help me get through now. Jesus can let them know when they meet Him how hard it was. And hopefully the effort counts as a sacrifice. I have heard conversion requires sacrifice, this is another way to help in conversions."

Showing love when you encounter the opposite and offering it up may be the holy sacrifice needed to save someone...it's hard, but that's why we call it sacrificial love.

 

I can remember when I was young and growing up, and my Mom would want us to do something we didn't like or even when we were older and had to do things we hated, she would always say "offer it up". I knew what she was saying, but I never really totally got it until later on when life started to really sends some hard stuff my way. I often wonder did she plant that seed in me so that someday I may help someone, like she did for so many years without us really knowing all the things she offered up. To this day all of my siblings still use that catch phrase of hers. I cherish it now.

 

Count yourself very blessed to have a mom who taught you the value of " offering it up"! You almost never hear that today. We need to bring that back....look at how after all these years, you remember....and now you understand. Bless your dear mother.

 

My mother RIP used to do that to us when we were kids, ie say 'offer it up.' I never understood the point of it. Anyway when I was well grown up, mother used to have great chats about everything. And if someone annoyed her she would have a good moan and complain about it.
Well one day we were headed off to town to get some shopping and she had been off loading something one of my brothers had done that had rattled her cage. Finally as we drove along, when she finished her complaint she said to me, "Julia what would you do?" To which I replied, "I would offer it up." Well poor mother went ballistic. And I said to her, now you know how I felt when you used to say that to us. We ended up having a good laugh when she realised.

 

I may have shared this before anyway. When my children were young I used to say that to them, of course they did not get it, I never got it as a child either.
My children to this day remember. The big thing was they did not like their vegetables and I used to say to them just think. If you offer up every pea you eat, you could save another soul.
My younger daughter said to me one day. Mum if Jesus can do anything, do you think He could change my dinner and glass of milk into Coke and Crisps. Kids!!!

 

That's a nice story Julia.

 

I think you are so very right about needing that back. I think at a very young age children need to learn what it is to sacrifice even if it is something very simple and not very important. It sets the example to which they can mold their conscience. and not become such a self centered person as an adult. It reduces the " I or me" and centers more on the "us and we" when they become adults.

 

Oh that is funny....sounds like a response one of my kids would have given me! But, it proves they were listening!

 

A good friend of mine shared a very simple, non theological bit of advice her mother Gave to her as a very young girl that really impressed me.
My friend wanted very badly to be the chosen to do the May crowing for her school. It was a honor and privledge. As a good student and a great example her catholic faith, My friend would have been the perfect candidate.
The day came when her teacher announced to the class who had been selected for this honor and to my friends great dismay, it was not her....but another girl. Upon arriving home, she shared the disappointing news with her good mother. She was almost in tears. Her mom sat her down , look at her and said, Katie, did you ever consider that maybe this other girl was chosen by God because SHE NEEDED it and you only wanted it? Katie said that she had never considered the need of the other girl....only her own desire. After thinking about it from her mothers perspective, she was able to accept the disappointment with grace. Additionally, she never forgot this and to this day would share it with her own children. To look at life situations we encounter from Gods perspective...that someone else's needs may be greater... and to trust His reasoning....not our own.
Oh....P.S.
After Katie's mother spent some time consoling her about her losing the May crowing honor, Katie had later discovered that her mother had gone into the bathroom and sobbed quietly about the May crowing herself. She was equally disappointed about her little girl not being picked....but she didn't let on in front of her. Now that's a mother!

 

all my family is about Jehovah's witness and most protestant

 

That must be a difficult position for you at times. Are you Catholic? Were you once Jehovah" Witness or Protestant.

 

You be their example....pray for them and let Jesus do the rest....TRUST....

 

I converted at 4-4-2016

I was protestant from 2011 to 2016
I was once interested in Jehovah's witness but didnt become baptized or anything my mother was a Jehovah's witness. I was just brainwashed But I got my way out. then I mlved into satantic new age stuff than I became a protestant but I have found the truth I know the catholic faith is true.