Here in Australia I am unable to attend a TLM unless I drive to Sydney which is a 7 hour drive from my home in northern NSW. Over the last few months (after watching videos and reading much {On the internet}about the scandals of the Novus Ordo Mass and its dubious institution during VII) I have seriously asked the Lord in daily prayer... Are You truly present in the Novus ordo consecration? But have not received any answer. I want to express what the Lord allowed me to understand at Adoration of Jesus in the monstrance before Holy Mass yesterday Friday the 20 May 2022 . This Friday Adoration, Confession and Mass has been offered at this parish for at least the last 5 years. It is the Parish that I made my first communion, was confirmed and attended for most of my formative years. This Parish underwent many horrendous innovations over the ensuing years of my youth, these were mainly my early teenage years, they tore out the altar rails when I was about 11 years old, they destroyed the high altar made of beautiful marble when I was about 13 years old and placed a wooden table in front of the tabernacle, then they removed the tabernacle from the main altar and placed Jesus in the unused nuns access to Mass area on the convent side of the church when I was about 13 - 14 years old, this is a small out of the way area. I remember visiting Him in this isolated and lonely area while at school, when I was in 3rd and 4th form aged 14 to 15 years old. At this time I was really searching for truth, because so much of real truth had been stripped from me at this point. I did not know what to make of this downgrading of Jesus. I would visit my Lord while at school as He resided in this side chapel which contained the tabernacle. One day I noticed the uncleanliness (dust) of the veil that covered the tabernacle and also the cobwebs that extended from the tabernacle to the walls (I suppose the light just hit in a certain way) and I realised, they have dethroned you Lord and they don't care about you. I wondered what this meant for My Jesus in the Holy Sacrament and for me! At this time I was still a nerd for God, despised and bullied by the cool girls of the all Catholic girl school of St Marys but at this time I was also being tempted to join the in crowd who seem to have all the answers. I left Jesus alone when I was 17 years old in 6th form (year 12 today) and only returned to Him (after much sin) just before I married at age 22 years. When I returned to Jesus I attended another parish (this parish was closer to my now new residence) and the parish priest was exceptionally Holy. I was fortunate to raise my children in this parish with this blessed priest. (However my children to this day need much prayer) After Father O'Hallaran, retired, I travelled to another parish about an hour attending this parish for about 3 years . However over the last 2 years, the Lord has brought me back to the parish of my childhood. It is about 30 minutes drive away. Last Friday, While in this church of my youth, and after all my questions of many weeks, Jesus in the Monstrance, revealed to me something wonderful about His real presence. Jesus said to my soul.... "remember when I was cast out and you and I spoke!" I acknowledged this time of my young teenage years. He said... " I want you to know that I did not leave the church, even when they disposed of me. I remained because of you and all those that love me. Be not afraid I remain here for you." How magnificent i9s our God! These words reveal Our Lords great Love for His abandoned children! No matter how much dust collects, nor cobwebs accumulate around Him. Jesus remains! Let us get on our knees and thank Him for His great Love and fidelity to us. Amen!
Lovely testimony. I can confirm it by my own experience. I too agonized over the Real Presence in the novus ordo Mass and tabernacles. I was in anguish over this. I went in front of the tabernacle and begged Our Lady to help me. Within minutes--literally--I encountered a priest ftom FSSP who insistently reassured me that Jesus is truly present in novus ordo tabernacles. And then came a clear impression in my mind--an understanding--that love and honor Him where He was so often dishonored was a great gift. I've never looked back. I prefer the ancient Mass of the Church but I am grateful for the "new" Mass when its the only one I can get to.
Of course He is present. Beware of the False Teachings of Schismatics. Traditionalist heretics are just as bad as Modernist heretics. They both lead to hell. There are many, many of both.
The spiritual life is a challenge these days. After all, I'm only a Deacon. In the parish I serve at in Pulaski, there are 2 wings and my Pastor has me distribute Holy Communion in one of these. Most communicants receive on the hand and one of them was grabbing the Sacred Host. That issue has been resolved. But then, I distribute Holy Communion with unconsecrated hands; however, I don't see that ever changing in Novus Ordo Masses. Therefore, the attitude of our hearts remain the key issue. After all, a Catholic attending a TLM can fall into an inner habit of inattentive reception of Holy Communion. So no matter where and when we participate in the Sacred Liturgy, we must prepare ourselves to practice sacred awareness. Ask your guardian angel to keep you focused, to worship from the heart. I am but human. My mind wanders at times. But as an act of love, each of us must strive to worship God, to be attentive to His Presence in the Tabernacle, to be attentive to the Word, to better understand the meaning of liturgical actions, no matter whether we are present before Him at a Novus Ordo or TLM Mass. The same goes for the Lord in the Monstrance during Adoration. For the Loving Lord is Holy! He desreves our unwavering attentive love. Psalm 29:1 Ascribe to the Lord, O heavenly beings, ascribe to the Lord glory and strength. 2 Ascribe to the Lord the glory of his name; worship the Lord in holy array. 3 The voice of the Lord is upon the waters; the God of glory thunders, the Lord, upon many waters. 4 The voice of the Lord is powerful, the voice of the Lord is full of majesty.
When I was in my early twenties, I had a troubling experience at Adoration. The priest set up the monstrance, placed Jesus inside, knelt before the altar and began praying...And I was staring in confusion because I couldn't see the Host!! I blinked several times, looked around at everyone (no one seemed like anything was wrong), and concluded I was under some sort of spiritual attack. The monstrance looked empty. As the priest prayed then left the altar, the lights were dimmed and we who remained knelt there praying silently. I was actually tearing up, begging God to let me see Him, when after several minutes of this agony, someone in the front pew stood up and left, returning shortly with the priest. The priest quickly ascended the altar, went to the monstrance, and turned Jesus around, Who had been FACING BACKWARDS. It turns out I wasn't being deprived of Christ; He was there all along. I think of that situation sometimes, when I think of what happened to the tabernacle and other changes in the churches. I, too, was a frequent lone visitor of the freestanding metal tabernacle hidden in a tiny side room. I actually had one of my most profound encounters with Jesus and experienced a very meaningful vision in front of that tabernacle. I know He was there. Though I always wished Jesus was in His rightful place behind the main altar, Him being outcast and set aside like I often was enabled me to be with Him in a more intimate way. I used to put my arms around the tabernacle to hold Jesus to my heart. Maybe I shouldn't have dared do that, and I certainly wouldn't have if the Tabernacle was up in the sanctuary in the proper place of honor...but maybe during those years Jesus was comforted in those many lowly side chapels in ways He might not have been otherwise. He and His fellow outcasts could lean on each others' hearts, abiding the time until the great restoration of His Church. When Jesus was turned around backwards in the monstrance, most, including the priest, didn't even notice! But a couple of us did...and that was enough to eventually get Him (Who had always been there) restored to His proper place.
It is strange to relate but I believe some Churches are holier than others. The Holiest Church by far in our city is Clonard Monastery, people travel from all around the world to visit it from all around the world. I started school at four years old and made my on way to and from school right away. Clonard Monastery was just around the corner and I would usually call in a visit on my way home way back then. Even then when I entered the Church you could feel the Eucharistic Presence like a blazing flame of fire and light. I am not saying that other Catholic Churches do not have this ; its just that in Clonard this sense of the Holy is overwhelming. I think in Scripture this Eucharistic Presence is prefigured in the Pillar of Fire and Smoke that went before the Israelites as they crossed the Desert. I have heard of a few Protestant Ministers who have actually been converted by simply visiting this Church. They speak openly about this sense of Presence being a cause of their conversion. It is only by the way, but just down the road from there is our Diocesan Cathedral, St Peter's. When It was being built in the early 1800's Protestant snipers opened fire on the construction workers all the time, stopping the building. However there was a young woman and mother in the Parish who happened to be a crack shot. She used to leave her children in the care of other ladies in the Parish and took her rifle round to the Cathedral to help out. Her shooting was so excellent, bless her , that sniping at the Cathedral ceased almost at once. They went away, if they were still able to, and never came back. Funny old world.
Being a convert, I have no memories of the Latin Mass. In fact, I've been to one only once, and had to be told what was going on at each step. I've been a Catholic for 25 years now (I'll be 60 in July), so I can only say that I've known only the "New" Mass. And I can say that Christ is present where he is worshipped. Not to say that there haven't been problems occasionally, but I know that I am currently where God wants me to be. I'm probably closer to Jesus where I am than I ever was as a Protestant. I've had to learn to slow down a bit and to stay away from thinking I have it all now. There are still plenty of things I still have to learn and all that. Our Church needs our prayers as much today as it ever has. There has been much discussion about the "end times" stuff among Protestants that it makes me wonder if those dark days are closing in on us. May we all look to God in prayer and find where He wants us to be and what He wants us to do.
