I know personally ,as well as knowing its a widespread thing, of parishes\priests asking for a "freely given stepind" for performing a baptism,marriage ceremony, etc. I also know of churches which directly charge -without the freely given part- for having a mass said for a dead relative. Is this an acceptable practice im misunderstanding? Or is it indeed bad to have money involved in dispensing sacraments? where is the line drawn? As I said, its very common for the parish office to require a family to give a token sum for a sacrament or even a mass.
My wife and I were Married in the eyes of the Church after confirmation. I gave the church a monetary gift for the Deacon's time, and Church time and was glad to. It wasn't something that had a set price tag but I'm sure if we were financially in challenging times a gift of $1 would not have been looked down upon. The parish school never refuses any catholic child and finds a way for all to receive a catholic education so I doubt it's any different with sacraments or anything else for that matter. The only time I have ever heard people taking offense at this kind of thing is generally protestants who don't like Catholicism in general. Not making an insinuation here, it's just been my experience as a convert. I should add that it's really no different than anything I experienced in my life as a protestant.
Maybe its a problem in my country then there are hundreds of cases of children getting kicked out of private catholic schools ,for example(is that what parish school means? Its bad,anyways) in the 2000-2002 crisis. the masses for the dead DO have a price tag here, tho! at least in one church I know.
Sorry to hear that xsantiagox. Yes, that was exactly what I meant by the parish school. I do know of one parish here that charges a fee for masses for the dead but it is a very minimal amount. What I've found here in the US is that if there are financial difficulties and you speak with your priest they are very helpful in finding alternatives to help ease the requirements. Many people who have raised their children also give to church funds specifically to help cover tuition for young families. A friend of mine who made quite a good salary (but spent it like water and was in a huge amount of debt) was able to help his church with technology related issues and even helped teach a few classes to students to cover a portion of his daughters tuition fee's.
There are costs associated with opening a church for a sacrament (lighting, heating etc) I never had an issue with giving money to the church. Now if the sacrament is being done during the normal Sunday mass or if those receiving the sacrament are truly cash strapped that’s something else, but I would assume that would be something discussed between the priest and the person(s) receiving the sacrament. When my parish priest comes to the hospital to administer the sacrament of the sick he never mentions money. But I have slipped a few dollars to him after the fact. Sometimes by just putting a note in the collection with some money covers it
Our parish asks for a $10 offering for a Mass request. Matrimony would be the only sacrament involving a specific stipend, and that covers musicians, altar servers, wedding coordinator, etc.